panish is at best grade school level. Unfortunately, so is his History, Math, Science. " Jay Leno "Did you see Britney Spears at the Video Music Awards. I don't want to say that that performance was a disaster, but after the show, I saw Rudy Giuliani having his picture taken standing on her. " Bill Maher "This week, General Petraeus has been testifying before Congress and today, a number of senators accused General Petraeus of lying. You've gotta understand why they're upset. If you soccer jerseys wholesale are going to deceive the American people, you do it the right way. you run for Congress. " Jay soccer jerseys wholesale Leno "O. J. Simpson's lawyer objected to O. J. being soccer jerseys wholesale held without bail. He said if he was anyone besides O. J. , he would have been released by now. If he was anyone but O. J. , he'd be serving life for double murder right now. " Jay Leno "When the cops arrested O. J. , they found him at the blackjack table trying to play the race card. " Jay Leno "The story is O. J. convinced five other guys. to go into a room to retrieve sports memorabilia that he says belonged to him. And as the late Johnnie Cochran once said, 'You can't steal a your own memorabilia. '. So now O. J. is in jail. Today he asked for reading glasses and a Bible. Actually, he wanted a Bible with the sixth and eighth commandments removed. " Jimmy Kimmel Jokes for the Week of Sept. 2 8 "In this new video, Osama bin Laden makes a pitch to America by attacking the Democrats. And then he says we should all convert to Islam 'cause there are no taxes. He's now running third in Iowa. Is it me or is bin Laden getting more Western in these videos. Like in this new one where he wants us to convert to Islam, he says if you act now, he'll throw in a free prayer rug. "

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